Flaming Carrot Rant!

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Image: Pauline Hanson unveiled One Nation’s policy blueprint this week. Credit: Velovotee (Creative Commons, Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0)

By Damian West

Hanson’s policy platform foregrounds the problem at the root of democracy, namely everybody’s vote is equal.

Can we introduce mandatory IQ-testing for voters and mandatory personality screening for politicians? I had to do those tests applying for work flipping burgers as a puss-faced teenager.

I’d find her hilarious except that there’s an increasingly galvanized section of our community defined by the brute, brain-stem impulses she speaks to with such persuasion: entitlement, white supremacy, false nostalgia and paranoia. She’s even started getting all jenny-from-the-block about her time in the can! “Look at me, I’m an oppressed and downtrodden victim, just like you!” She understands the crude psychology of these idiots and knows how to push their shiny red buttons. And those gimps’ votes weigh the same as yours and mine. Can you believe it? #unbohlievable!

And can journos please quit pointing mics and cameras at her stupid face? And if you absolutely must, can you please do your job properly? Don’t be a loser. Start by asking more questions and calling her out on her stupidity and hate mongering. Quit acting as a defacto megaphone for her bigotry and ignorance, you idiots.

While I’m at it, can we open up a royal commission into fuckwits and rednecks?

And can we introduce a 100% flat taxation on all political donations to One Nation?

Finally, Kit Kat sushi bars are opening in Japan now – I really gotta get my arse over there and check this shit out! #DroppingKnowledge 

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